It’s not easy knowing what to say. When to say it or whom to say it to. It can be a struggle of not wanting to burden others but also wanting so desperately to be heard and know that you’re heard.
There’s always someone who is worse off, so you certainly don’t want to give the impression that you’re whining. But there are those times when you feel the weight so keenly on your chest, your shoulders, your heart, and your mind…
I didn’t want to be quiet after I moved. Oh, I had such plans to complete all the have written posts I have (already) scattered around the house on scraps of paper and sticky notes. The plans I have for zine projects and activities that, well, I thought I’d have set up by now.
The thing is, I’m struggling. But that’s okay.
The move has been a wonderful thing; don’t get me wrong. My asthma and, unexpectedly, chronic fatigue have improved. There is a level of tension and stress that has all but gone from my life thanks to my new location. Alas, losing not one but three friends in such incredibly painful ways have left me feeling burnt by people I trusted, unsteady, and so much more alone than I used to be.
I write this post not to gain sympathy or make excuses. I write this because there’s no shame in writing it. There’s no reason why I or anyone else can’t talk about depression. I will not be part of a stigma that sees me and people like me feeling like they have to hide.
I’m afraid I don’t have an inspiring to write at this point – as much as I would like to. I will say thanks for all the encouragement, support, and lovely nice little notes and comments. It all reminds me of kind and good things, and we all need reminders of these things sometimes.
I will be back tomorrow with a zine review because it’s what I do – and what I love to do. <3